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Remember when you were dating your husband? Anxiously waiting for his phone call or the next text. Being happy to just be in the same room with him. Him being your first thought when you wake and your last when you fall asleep. That excitement. That mystery.
Things definitely change when you get married- and they should. We can’t stay in that honeymoon stage our whole life. It wouldn’t be natural and really it wouldn’t be good for us. But we can still keep that excitement in our marriage. I believe the only way to do that is to WORK FOR IT. It won’t happen on it’s own. It requires work.
- Love notes. Doesn’t have to be roses are red and violets are blue. But maybe throw a note in his coat pocket (yes, we are still wearing coats up here in the Arctic in July) or his pants pocket. A simple “I love you so much” or “Missing you!” can add some excitement to his day.
- Make his favorite food. When we were dating I quickly discovered Shane LOVED lemon meringue pie and made it on every special occasion I could. Being that most of our dating months were in college I didn’t get to bake for him that often. But when I did- it was lemon meringue pie. I know that is still his favourite treat and making that for him will tell him I have been thinking about him.
- Flirt. Have silly banter or inside jokes with each other. Be silly and tease a little. Yesterday my husband said the highlight of his day was when I was acting silly when we were texting. Do some things that you know will make him laugh and give you a little extra attention from him.
- Hold hands. Disclaimer- I am not saying dating couples should necessarily hold hands. However- holding hands whenever you are walking aside each other will bring you back to the early days of marriage at least. We always held hands back then…ya know, before the 3 children that use up all our hands now. Still now, though, whenever we are free of children for any amount of time the first thing Shane does is grab my hand.
- Ask him questions about himself. That mystery I mentioned earlier- that’s what made it so exciting. I feel like after (almost) 8 years of marriage I know just about everything there is to know about Shane. But from time to time a subject will pop up and I will ask him his thoughts or opinions on it. Think of ways you can get to know your husband better and ask him about it.
What about you? What were some of the exciting things about dating that you feel like you could re-install into your marriage? What things have you continued throughout your marriage from your dating years? I’d love for you to share with us!
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